|..... you should
never have joined.
|In the early 1970s there
was a comedy show called 'On The Buses'. This
was centred round the antics of a bus crew
and their arch enemy, the inspector. The show
became compulsive viewing, so much so that
we had to see the end before going out on
the next journey. The canteen in Southampton
was upstairs and passengers on the top deck
of the buses could see in. It didn't matter,
we and they were going nowhere until the programme
ended. You can always make up a quarter of
was a spate of sabotage on unattended vehicles.
A crew would come back from the café
to find all the seats removed. One crew suffered
a variation on this. They found the branch
of a tree had been dragged upstairs and pushed
the length of the top deck. The branches had
opened out under the seats. The only thing
to do was take the bus to the garage and find
|A wet afternoon, we were
late and the people seemed to be taking forever
to board the bus. I was upstairs and as soon
as I saw the last woman get on I hit the bell.
The driver pressed the button to close the
electric doors and pulled away. I watched
the woman walk from the platform into the
bus. She had a pole under her arm. It stuck
out behind her. I looked out of the window.
For some strange reason there was a heap of
leaves by the bus stop.
|Traffic lights could be
fun. Not looking what I was doing, head down
collecting fares on the top deck, out of the
corner of my eye I could see the mirror. Someone
got on. I rang the bell. The driver pulled
away. Through the red light we had been waiting
|A variation on this game
was played by certain drivers. They would
pull up in the wrong lane at traffic lights.
The driver of a following bus, knowing they
were on different routes, would automatically
take the lane alongside. Then, to the first
driver's amusement, the second would set off
in the wrong direction when the lights turned